Trip Report: Sightglass Coffee, Version 0.3

Posted by TheShot on 02 Jul 2009 | Tagged as: Beans, Local Brew, Machine, Roasting

Thanks to a reader tip (which are always welcome and encouraged, btw), we were alerted to the opening this week of Sightglass Coffee in one of the danker parts of SOMA. Note that by “opening” we mean “unlocked” — and not much more than that.

If this sounds a lot like the “modest” opening of Four Barrel Coffee, it’s no coincidence. Owners/brothers Jerad and Justin Morrison have years of veteran experience that includes roasting at Blue Bottle Coffee and the opening of Four Barrel Coffee.

The inviting space that is the Sightglass Coffee kiosk The Morrison brothers behind the counter of what little is currently Sightglass Coffee

You’d miss this space if you weren’t looking for it. We honestly had to duck under a half-open garage door to get in, and the place looked like it was closing up shop. But despite the tiny serving space at a serving cart on wheels, this is just one corner of a vast, 1924-built, 4,000-sq-ft space with a 25-foot ceiling — or about the size of a typical large auto-body shop in the area. Except this place serves coffee … and not much else (if you include the salt caramels).

They have a Chemex brewing station, which is somewhat unique for the area, but the main attraction is their refurbished two-group La Marzocco GS2 espresso machine — straight out of the 1970s, and a sister to the one just installed at Intelligentsia’s fabled Venice Beach location. Replace cheesy 1970s leather with wood, tune up the parts, and they’ve got a pretty serious machine for enthusiasts.

I love what you've done with this place -- it's Sightglass Coffee Sightglass Coffee's Chemex bar has modest origins

Rear space and 14-kg Probat at Sightglass CoffeeOf course — as with all these Works-In-Progress Cafés, Inc. — it doesn’t stop there. Since the new model of opening notable coffee bars these days is to open stripped-down with many promises to upgrade later, the Morrison brothers soon plan to employ one of those fancy new Slayer espresso machines in the near future — as showcased at the 2009 SCAA conference — putting their Slayer customer ID in the single digits. Will its manual control of brewing pressure blow our minds? Only time will tell, folks. In the meantime, we can’t help but snicker every time we hear the machine’s name — which conjures up images of Stumptown’s Duane Sorenson head-banging while playing air guitar to “Disciple“.

It’s just not the machine that’s slated for an upgrade, either. They currently have access to Verve Coffee Roasters‘ inventory and equipment until the 14-kg Probat roaster is installed and fired up for their own local roasting. As always in this town, the permit process is one of the key roadblocks. Though they hope to have things up and running in September, we wouldn’t be surprised if they’re still waiting in December.

Sightglass Coffee's La Marzocco GS2 - the 70's are back! The Sightglass Coffee espresso

The resulting shot has a dark, healthy crema. It’s a touch thin on body, but it has a potent pungent flavor of cloves, herbs, etc. There isn’t much to the dynamic range of the flavors, but what’s there is handled well. Served in classic brown ACF cups.

Don’t mind the 90% of the floorspace that’s still being prepped for their lonely Probat. This place will need revisits, as so much is bound to change in the future. For now, it’s a good shot with the promise of becoming better down the road.

Read the preliminary review of Sightglass Coffee. In the meantime, here’s a video of Sightglass making a cap in action:

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Hate the Bauer, love the coffee

Posted by TheShot on 25 Jun 2009 | Tagged as: Local Brew, Restaurant Coffee, Starbucks

It’s tough to be a newspaper man these days. Having run out of tiresome video game and comic book themes, they’re now making Hollywood movies out of bloggers. It seems that anyone with a Twitter account can also get a book deal — ironically celebrating the very media format it supposedly deems irrelevant. So we avoid the knee-jerk reactions when a newspaper staple like SF Chronicle restaurant critic, Michael Bauer, publishes a brief write-up on the local coffee scene: Michael Bauer: Between Meals : Let’s have another cup of coffee.

Trust us: a guy like Mr. Bauer has his haters. The guy even has recent exposés of his identity — Superman-style — despite the fact that his face has been on “WANTED” posters in SF restaurant kitchens for years, offering a bounty for any restaurant employee who identifies his arrival.

What we appreciate about Mr. Bauer is that he makes no pretense about being a coffee expert. That you’ve developed a professional palate for food doesn’t convey credentials as a coffee expert, purely by association, just because both activities involve your mouth. This is a far cry from the megalomania of some Bay Area celebrity chefs who think their coffee reigns supreme — when, in fact, it loses taste tests comparing them with an airport Starbucks. A bellwether of intelligence is a self-awareness of limitations.

In the article, Mr. Bauer notes that, “Blue Bottle has become a name with loads of cachet, and coffee made in a French press is practically becoming as ubiquitous as tap water.” We couldn’t help but notice this very phenomenon this evening, as we watched Noe Valley’s Contigo produce French presses of the stuff like a factory assembly line for coffee-craving customers. Before even asking who supplied their beans, we (correctly) suspected it was branded Blue Bottle just by the heavy rotation at their coffee grinder. (Oddly enough, we found the resulting press pot to be a bit underwhelming — in flavor, freshness, etc. — for the pedigree.)

And to prove his own ignorance of the topic, the last half of Mr. Bauer’s article on “artisan coffee” (his term, not ours) concerns McDonald’s and Starbucks — which have about as much to do with artisan coffee as a Big Mac has to do with Kobe beef. The difference here being that we can forgive the guy — he clearly knows not of what he speaks. But at least he’s not pretending to be something he’s not.

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Fables of the Reconstruction: New Yorkers say their coffee has finally arrived

Posted by TheShot on 14 Jun 2009 | Tagged as: Foreign Brew, Quality Issues

Over the years, we’ve dropped notes about New York City’s coffee culture: from its origins as a desolate wasteland through its more recent redemption. Like the awkward and homely tomboy who first gussies herself up for the debutant ball, in the past year New York City has been running a major publicity campaign to promote their coffee “arrival”. (”We matter! Really!”) One of the latest examples is Edible Manhattan’s recent article, “Coffee Groundswell”, penned by Liz Clayton: Bean Scene | May-June 2009.

In 1997, Kurt Russell was in search of a decent cup of coffee The article is a pretty good recap of the story we all already know: New York prides itself as the center of everything cultural; for decades the provincial corners of the country sipped fine espresso while New Yorkers were forced to chug swill; and after the turn of the millennium things started to turn around. We can overlook Ms. Clayton’s telling use of the word “coffeerati” and a little too much focus on the gadgetry of the Clover brewer as a proxy for good coffee. But we couldn’t overlook the main focus of the piece, which is clearly reflected in its subtitle: “Gotham joe finally catches up”.

Why? Because it hasn’t caught up. For the most part, New York is still the wagging tail of coffee dogs from the more provincial parts of America: Portland, Seattle, San Francisco, Chicago, Durham, etc.

We can sympathize with the regional shame that must exist when a post-Communist reconstruction Prague served quality “Seattle style” coffee from independent cafés years before New York City seemed to even consider it. But the anxious desire to wash away that shame could conceivably create a skewed state of self-perception. Ms. Clayton’s piece very much rings a “we have arrived!” bell to the rest of the country, putting us all on notice that we have no reason to snicker and sneer over that backwoods on the Hudson.

“The difference between a lady and a flower girl is not how she behaves, but how she is treated. “

But to have truly arrived, you need to have a coffee culture of your own — and quality coffee solidly remains an import, not an export, market in New York. So instead of New York’s true arrival on the coffee scene, what we have more is a city that’s akin to a sunken ship being exhumed from its watery grave through the mutual aid of foreign prospectors.

The New York coffee “Gold Rush” is dominated by an invasion of professionals from the aforementioned provincial cities and towns, looking to fill NY’s great coffee void while seizing potentially great business opportunities. New York has become to coffee what China became to Western product marketers when economic trade barriers first opened up: an opportunity to access millions of potential new customers, long shielded from the outside, and the corresponding promise of potential riches.

Sure, with the likes of Gimmie! and Ninth Street Espresso, New York can claim a few years of native influence. It’s also good to see New York roasters doing more to boost their local relevance. But to make a crude comparison using Seattle’s two most notable 1990s cultural exports, quality coffee and grunge, Seattle can boast Nirvana, the Melvins, and Pearl Jam while New York has the Stone Temple Pilots (OK, they were from San Diego) — but yet little else to show for themselves.

And it’s not just that people expect New York City to lead cultural trends, rather than to dawdle in following them. For a city of its size and population, the market penetration of quality coffee is still lousy. (Or, as we put it in a recent post, the ratio of quality coffee shops to New York residents rivals that of Toby Keith fans in North Korea.) New York residents deserve to have good coffee in the same per-capita abundance currently available in, say, Los Angeles — which itself was a coffee wasteland until a few years ago.

I may be able to now find quality coffee in New York, but I wouldn’t put Gotham on my list of coffee destinations anytime soon. Until at least that much happens, any “catching up” is still a work in progress.

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Fool’s Cappuccino Redux?: Blue Bottle’s SG-120

Posted by TheShot on 10 Jun 2009 | Tagged as: Beans, Local Brew, Machine, Quality Issues

A couple months ago, we kicked up a bit of dust when we dressed down the Gibraltar, an espresso beverage created by accident when Blue Bottle Coffee Co. was opening their first SF café in 2005. We called it the fool’s cappuccino — essentially the same beverage, but poured in a cheap restaurant supply glass and gushed over by those who questionably valued faddishness and faux exclusivity over beverage quality. Blue Bottle’s follow-up act in the restaurant-supply-glassware-as-drink-name category is the SG-120, and we put it to the CoffeeRatings.com sensory test.

As many a curious customer asks, what is an SG-120? And why does an espresso drink have a name that sounds more like a license plate number, a Soviet rocket launcher, or a brand of synthetic motor oil? Searching for “SG-120″ on Google, we found that it is also the name of a single door steam jacketed gravity sterilizer and a rotation mill for “viscous or sticky products”. More to the point, as with the Gibraltar, the SG-120 is named after a restaurant supply glass the beverage is served in — this time a shotglass from Japanese glass maker, Hairo.

The SG-120, from the Hairo Glass Web site

The SG-120 sensory test

Unlike the Gibraltar, Blue Bottle Cafe actually lists the SG-120 on their coffee menu. They typically offer it for about $3.50 from their single origin Bosco machine — along with the options of the less-milk macchiato ($3.25) and a straight double shot ($3).

Blue Bottle Cafe had been producing SG-120s from their Misty Valley Ethiopia beans until their Bosco had to be sent out for repairs. The machine returned from the shop this week — along with their Chapada Diamantina Brasil as the featured single origin coffee (which shares its name with a national park in Brasil’s state of Bahia). On Wednesday they served us an SG-120 with a smooth, integrated, and well-blended emulsion of coffee and frothed milk. Oddly, it was so smooth it almost didn’t taste much like coffee — more akin to a liquid candy bar.

Blue Bottle Cafe's Bosco lever machine is back in service The Blue Bottle Cafe SG-120

Despite its non-coffee-like qualities, it was an impressive beverage. But given the SG-120 it came in, it begged the obvious question: would we have enjoyed it more if it were served in a demitasse? Our answer was a definitive “absolutely”. The SG-120 detracted from the experience with some poor glass aesthetics: the SG-120 is thin-lipped, much flimsier than the Gibraltar, it felt “cheap” and almost disposable, and its thinness and materials added no real thermal properties. So once again, we were convinced by the beverage — but not the suboptimal serving format.

(As an aside, Ben, an Apple employee from Vancouver who was visiting the nearby Apple developer’s conference, showed me photos of Chapada Diamantina national park on his iPhone while sampling the same coffee in a siphon pot. His take was that it was very clean, bright, and straightforward — lacking any buttery characteristics, etc. We picked up some beans to test the home version ourselves.)

Blue Bottle's Chapada Diamantina beans

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A neighborhood coffee roll call

Posted by TheShot on 09 Jun 2009 | Tagged as: Foreign Brew, Quality Issues, Starbucks

Today’s post is really a series of news citations where coffee-making rivals duke it out in various venues.

First we have New York City-based BlackBook praising a rather healthy list of cafés to check out in Vancouver, BC: Vancouver: Top 10 Cups of Coffee – BlackBook. Sure, they seem to say more about waffles and string-wrapped sandwiches than they provide any details on the quality of the coffee. But what do you expect for a local entertainment e-rag?

Is everybody writing about their jones for coffee in some other continent? What follows is the Sydney Morning Herald giving Aussies a fill of respectable cafés in New York City: New York’s best coffee and cafes: baristas worth every bean. Although we’d still fly to Sydney or Vancouver long before subjecting ourselves to the coffee in New York City, Gotham City has at least elevated itself to one decent coffee shop for every three million residents … or about the same proportion as Toby Keith fans in North Korea.

And traditional coffee battles wouldn’t be complete without Gourmet magazine taking a Roman holiday that pitted the merits of the snide Sant’Eustachio il caffè against the populist-but-tacky Tazza d’Oro: CIAO, ROMA! Coffee and Gelato Edition: Food + Cooking : gourmet.com. We love them both — though among some locals in the centro storico, their rivalry makes Raiders-49ers matches seem like a tea party. (But if you really want to get into sporting rivalries with the locals, Roma-Lazio is the closest thing Europe has to a biannual re-enactment of Anzio.)

All hail the boxing landfill: winning this battle is like winning the Taliban's humanitarian award Last, and most definitely least, we have perhaps one of the most anti-climactic battles in the world of coffee — Starbucks crowing over their Zagat-rated supremacy in the fast food category: Zagat votes, Starbucks gloats. Vainglory may have been cool enough to make the cut for the seven deadly sins. But when your trash-talk concerns your pecking order relative to McDonald’s and Dunkin’ Donuts, the battle is already lost. Save your victory dance for when your competition isn’t known for their mechanically separated chicken dunked in high-fructose corn syrup.

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Bay Area restaurants still struggle with “the coffee thing”

Posted by TheShot on 27 May 2009 | Tagged as: Barista, Beans, Machine, Quality Issues, Restaurant Coffee, Roasting

We are not the only ones who have lamented the sorry state of restaurant coffee — particularly at some of the Bay Area’s finest restaurants. The San Francisco Chronicle made poor restaurant coffee a front-page headline as early as 1963.

Some 46 years later and still a public disgrace In some ways, the elevated coffee standards that exist outside of the restaurant world are slowly creeping in. Yet the gap is still exceedingly large: of the current Top 28 on CoffeeRatings.com, only one location, Bar Bambino, is an actual restaurant.

There is a litany of reasons for why this is. Unfortunately, much of the food service/restaurant industry seems clueless about them. Case and point is a recent article published on the culinary Web site, Behind the Burner: Interview With a Coffee Roaster – Article – Behind the Burner TM.

The author, John Grossmann, interviews Alex Roberts, master roaster at Emeryville-based Roast Coffee Co.. Roast opened in early 2008 as part of the Bacchus Management Group (love the Web site, btw), a small management team behind a handful of eclectic Bay Area restaurants. Mr. Grossmann calls Roast an “unusual startup” that’s performing a “new twist in dining” by sourcing and roasting its own beans. And that’s where the naïveté starts spilling out.

Bean there, done that

For one, roasters offering restaurants custom roasts and blends has been a common practice for decades. One potentially different angle could be in custom bean sourcing, but market economics would prevent Roast from directly sourcing beans from different farms for a single restaurant — which would be the only new ground there. Bacchus Management Group promotes Roast as unique because it is “by the restaurants, for the restaurants”, but exclusively servicing the industry’s least discriminating business customers hardly seems like a virtue.

The interview then succumbs to the ever-popular wine analogy. (It’s quite ironic that they should then do that, given that we cannot think of any restaurant-operated wineries worthy of note.) Mr. Grossmann asks, “Has the day of the coffee sommelier dawned?” To which Mr. Roberts replies:

I think so. I’d love to have the first job as a coffeelier, let’s call it. This would be somebody who understands all the single origins. All the specifications of the farm it came from, all the nuances of the coffee. Is it high grown, low grown? If there’s a blend, what each coffee in the blend contributes. The coffeelier would also suggest coffee and dessert pairings.

What’s so wrong about a restaurant coffee sommelier?

And therein lies the rub. Any restaurant mention of a coffee sommelier invariably glosses over the fact that a successful coffee service isn’t as simple as merely pulling a cork on a bottle of roasted beans. Just a couple weeks ago, we posted an article with the common opinion that a great barista can make magic of weak bean sources, and that superior beans and roasts can go to rot in untrained hands and poorly maintained equipment. Machine maintenance and “barista” training standards at restaurants are still woefully inadequate at best.

The coffee sommelier makes South Korean soap opera fame as a character in 'The 1st Shop of Coffee Prince' That’s not to say there’s anything wrong with dreaming of the day that restaurants offer a variety of coffee options and a guide, or coffeelier, to walk patrons through them. But while Roast can tweak their fresh bean formula until the cows come home, any lofty designs for restaurant coffee appreciation will fail miserably if they’re built upon a rotten foundation of poor training, faulty equipment maintenance, and shoddy brewing practices.

An article from last year does suggest that training is an integral part of Roast’s engagement with restaurants. However, elite Bay Area roasters have long expressed immense frustration at getting training compliance out of cafés, let alone the scattered attention of restaurants. (Some have even expressed using CoffeeRatings.com for business intelligence — to identify retailers doing unmerciful things to their roasts, pointing to our site’s reviews as evidence of the need for training.) Roast Coffee Co.’s three-person operation is hardly poised to succeed where so many larger organizations have failed.

Until these fundamentals are addressed, Mr. Roberts’s dream of being a coffeelier rings about as hollow as a dentist who waxes poetic about the latest laser teeth whitening technology but cannot be bothered with the mundane task of actually cleaning and polishing your teeth. What good are white teeth if plaque and gum disease cause them to fall out? Coffee sourcing, roasting, and a lack of coffeeliers aren’t the problem. Restaurant coffee standards will not improve until the basics of training, maintenance, storage, and a commitment to quality are fixed.

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The Tyrrany of Forced Rankings, or: The Annual Esmeralda Watch

Posted by TheShot on 21 May 2009 | Tagged as: Beans, Consumer Trends

Because it is patently uncool for legitimate coffee professionals to gush over gag novelties for coffee tourists — i.e., kopi luwak — the media needs an alternative outlet to feed its overly simplistic “since it’s the most expensive, it must be the best” obsession. This is what we once called the nouveau riche stereotype: knowing the price of everything but the value of nothing (credit to Oscar Wilde’s quote on cynics). Coffee from Panama’s Hacienda La Esmeralda farm fits the bill nicely, and the worldwide media parade hit the streets with the news that their Esmeralda Special fetched $117.50 a pound at auction this week.

So far, this week’s hit parade includes NBC Bay Area, who yesterday reported on an industry cupping of the Esmeralda at the Flora Grubb Gardens: Cupping Coffee With Bay Area “Titans” NBC Bay Area. “Titans”? Are NBC headlines not-so-subtly plugging the DVD sales of their long-canceled TV series?

Even more bizarre, the article cited the L.A. Times — which decided that a coffee cupping among Bay Area roasters in SF’s Bayview district was newsworthy in the Southland: ‘Cupping’ with the boutique coffee titans in San Francisco | Daily Dish | Los Angeles Times. (Nice photo in the L.A. Times, btw, stolen below.) But beyond Bay Area cuppings, Esmeralda news and cuppings have reached as far as London’s The Guardian: Is the ‘world’s best’ coffee worth it? | Life and style | guardian.co.uk.

L to R: Colby Barr, David Pohl, Phil Anacker, Andy Newbom and Ryan Brown at the Esmeralda cupping at Flora Grubb Gardens. Credit: Deborah Netburn

Of course, we’re no better — having written about the Esmeralda Geisha breaking price records in 2006 and publishing our own road-testing experience with the coffee in 2007. The trouble is that while the Hacienda La Esmeralda farm produces some fantastic coffees (the farm also scored highest at a Rainforest Alliance cupping in April), they’re hardly the only player. But with the way human psychology works sometimes, you might never know that.

The cruelties of second place

All it takes is scoring ahead of another coffee by a few, relatively insignificant digits to make all the difference when forced rankings are involved. CoffeeRatings.com uses such a forced-ranking system, and we can honestly say that the differences between our #1 and #5 are insignificant enough to flip-flop their order with something as subtle as the day’s humidity.

Subjective matters of personal taste aside, who can honestly discern the clear superiority of a coffee that scores 88.60 versus one that gets an 87.69? But we are invariably asked by anyone unfamiliar with our Web site, “What is your #1 coffee?”

Curiously enough, the Hacienda La Esmeralda did not win the 2009 Roasters Guild Coffee of the Year (pdf, 57kb). That went to a coffee from composite triple beatC.I. Viramax Colombia S. A., and La Esmeralda came in second. And the 2008 Roasters Guild Coffee of the Year went to a coffee from Colombia’s C.I. Racafe & CIA S.C.A., where La Esmeralda also came in second.

Of course, there’s no dishonor in perennially placing in second. Its price tags at auction and the familiar consistency of La Esmeralda contribute to its prominence in the press as the world’s ‘best’ coffee. But good luck finding this kind of hype for one of the recent Colombia winners. On the top, there’s only room for one. Adding others to the mix would only be too confusing.

UPDATE: June 12, 2009
Newsday published a brief series of photos from the aforementioned cupping event, explaining a cupping along the way: The elaborate art of coffee cupping: Step by step — Newsday.com.

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Trip Report: Napa Valley Coffee Roasting Co. (St. Helena, CA)

Posted by TheShot on 20 May 2009 | Tagged as: Beans, Foreign Brew, Roasting

This St. Helena outlet of a two-location Napa coffeehouse and roaster routinely receives “best coffeehouse” awards in the area. Given how they handle roasted beans, consumer coffee education, and filter coffee, this isn’t much of a surprise — particularly given their general lack of legitimate competition in the region. But from what we can tell, these accolades are for everything but their espresso.

Like their sister location in Napa, this spot is a large, barn-like wooden structure. It has skylights, a few patio tables in front, and plenty of seating inside. There’s also a working Probat roaster at the back, a community book trade, and a central counter devoted to retail coffee bean sales and a four-cup Melitta bar.

Entrance to the Napa Valley Coffee Roasting Co. in St. Helena Inside the Napa Valley Coffee Roasting Co., St. Helena

Napa Valley Coffee Roasting Co.'s retail coffee menu Napa Valley Coffee Roasting Co's St. Helena Probat roaster

Also like their Napa location, they use an unusual two-group Diadema machine for espresso. With it, they pull shots with a medium brown, textured crema that barely coats the surface. It comes in a larger pour size. The resulting shot has a bit of bulk when you taste it, emphasizing body over brightness. Flavorwise, it has an earthy, slightly smoky flavor that also, unfortunately, tastes too much of ash.

The Napa Valley is certainly about wine. It might even be about coffee a little if you look hard enough. But it’s definitely not about espresso — at least yet.

Read the review of the Napa Valley Coffee Roasting Company in St. Helena.

The Napa Valley Coffee Roasting Co. espresso, St. Helena

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Trip Report: L.A. Café

Posted by TheShot on 16 May 2009 | Tagged as: Beans, Café Society, Local Brew, Quality Issues

Recently we have been thinking about all the great, Top-20-caliber SF coffee bars that have opened up in recent years. So much so that the news of a great new espresso bar opening in town is thankfully becoming a little monotonous. With all the great coffee now available, we thought we could all use a helpful reminder of how bad things can get.

For anyone who watches a TV program involving food these days, there’s the tiresome, obligatory money shot of the chef or host sampling a dish, smirking to the camera after a mouthful, and exclaiming “Mmmmm, that’s delicious!” It’s never, “Ick! What’s that weird texture?,” or “Do you taste something metallic?,” or “I don’t think I’ll be coming here again.” With no sense of balance, it’s nearly impossible to truly appreciate the good stuff.

View from L.A. Café: 7up-branded transient rooms and an Airstream trailer on a roof Entrance to L.A. Café - OK, actually it's only an emergency exit

So where to find SF espresso’s misery market — the coffee shop equivalent of bumwine.com? (A favorite site of ours, btw.) While inside Farm:Table earlier this week, the four-packs of Café Bustelo on display were more trash-as-treasure than, say, the outright trash we were seeking. So we walked a few blocks from there into the heart of the Tenderloin and encountered a temple of physical self-abuse we could not resist: the L.A. Café at Turk and Jones Sts.

While it’s too easy to speak ill of the Tenderloin and its many disadvantaged and addled residents, there are few blocks in the city where you can view an Airstream trailer parked on the roof of a four-story building — just past a faded outdoor wall painting advertising 7up and “transient rooms” (see photo above). And yet this is hardly one of the Tenderloin’s worst intersections.

Inside L.A. Café - completed with drugged-out man in a hood in front Have you ever seen pastries under plastic so appetizing?

Everything about the place screamed, “Run! Don’t walk!” But even if going into a place like this to sample the espresso requires a mental state akin to donating your body to science, we couldn’t help ourselves. Even if we risked nightmares and waking up from our fitful sleep in cold sweats thinking about the place afterward.

Nothing more inviting on a café's entrance than a No Trespassing sign from the SF police Where to begin? The corner entrance has no fewer than two signs designating it as an emergency exit only. There are also no fewer than two “No Trespassing” signs posted by the SF police in their store windows — to deter vagrancy. So you have to walk inside via a side entrance further down Jones St.

Once inside, it looks like any Happy Donuts/Sad Espresso chain, with its plain tables and chairs. But this is misery coffee at its finest — complete with the very same neon coffee sign you can ironically find at China Basin’s The Creamery.

At the far end of the café was a drugged-out, hooded Dave Chappelle look-alike who, perched over a table, did not move during the 30 minutes we were inside. The rest of the clientele who came in and out sported either gold teeth or wheelchairs, if not both. The pastries are covered in plastic, and the owners sport a Vietnamese calendar advertising bail bonds. If this is called “L.A. Café”, it’s clearly modeled more after downtown Broadway than Hollywood.

Vietnamese bail bonds calendar adds to the ambiance If you see these from America's Best Coffee: run, don't walk

Using a two-group Astoria machine with the portafilter handles left out cooling in the drip tray, they pull surprisingly short shots of “espresso” that look and taste more like water than anything else. And, no surprise, they serve one of SF’s finest examples of ghetto coffee: America’s Best Coffee. Their homeopathic espresso comes coated with a balding layer of almost white-pale crema and tastes neither bitter nor ashy — nor much like anything at all. At a steep $1.75 price, we have to figure that the owners are gouging like anyone else trying to make a living in this neighborhood.

Currently L.A. Café is ranked tied for 609th place among SF’s best espresso shots, but it’s not the worst by a longshot. Scarier is that their 2.40 coffee rating still significantly trumps their 1.50 café rating, thus tying L.A. Café with an aforementioned Happy Donuts for SF’s third worst in the café rating category.

Read the review of L.A. Café.

Tuning up the ol' Astoria at L.A. Café The L.A. Café espresso - tastes like Normandie Avenue

After our sordid and tasteless espresso experience at L.A. Café, we could only think of this following sordid and tasteless video of Vince, the hooker-beating ShamWow guy, and how he hates L.A.:



UPDATE: June 3, 2009
And if you want to know the bottom of the coffee barrel in St. Paul, MN, we bring you: St. Paul’s Two Worst Cups of Coffee « The Heavy Table.

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Trip Report: Farm:Table

Posted by TheShot on 15 May 2009 | Tagged as: Beans, Local Brew, Roasting

Opening just a week ago — in the space previously occupied by the Illy shop, Caffé Il Latte — this tiny café is the first in San Francisco to use beans from Santa Cruz-based Verve Coffee Roasters.

The tiny space relies on mirrored walls to add depth, and there is a little bit of a kitchen to prepare their local, organic foods. But it seems largely about the coffee here — even if people are apparently always coming in asking for bagels. There’s a single square wooden table inside with wooden bench seating on two ends.

Meanwhile, their three-group La Marzocco Linea at the front counter almost dominates the space. The place is run by two former Blue Bottle staffers in Kate and Shannon Amitin, and Verve was convinced this was the right place to start an SF presence.

Entrance to the tiny Farm:Table Café Bustelo? Someone has been drinking too much PBR

For their standard espresso shot (reviewed here), they use Verve’s All-City blend — which was custom designed for the café. Shannon indicates he wanted an espresso blend without “trendy” fruitiness in its flavor profile, and the All-City delivers a potent, sharp, extremely bright shot that reminds us a little of Stumptown’s Hairbender. They were going for an Italian-style espresso, and it is served relative short and with a very potent herbal flavor. (It is not for the meek who like their coffee mellow or with milk.)

They considered forgoing the whole “single origin thing”, but they offer a unique Sumatra ($3.50) that contrasts greatly with their espresso blend: more floral and smooth-bodied. Served in classic brown ACF cups. And to appeal to the trendy misery coffee market, they also sell cans of Café Bustelo. Kate’s SF-famous sea salt caramels are also on offer.

Read the review of Farm:Table.

Farm:Table's La Marzocco Linea dominates the tiny space with a row of Verve beans below The Farm:Table espresso

A San Francisco Espresso Milestone?

Farm:Table represents a sort of milestone for us — and a good one at that. In the six years we’ve been publishing espresso reviews here at CoffeeRatings.com, we’ve witnessed a number of coffee bar openings…and closures. We see Farm:Table representing the natural turnover from a previous generation of coffee bars to a new one with much better standards.

We’ve long been noting how often new coffee bar openings crack our Top 20 rankings for the city. Many of them have been highly publicized and located in SF’s “trend-friendly” neighborhoods. But when the replacement for a hole-in-the-wall café opens up in a less-traveled coffee neighborhood, offering excellent espresso and featuring a new roaster for the city, we have to take a step back and appreciate how much local standards have improved in San Francisco.

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